NICK JONAS Reveals the TRAUMATIC Birth of his Daughter (YouTube Video Transcript)

(00:00:00) Your YouTube transcript will appear here (00:00:32) Nick, I I feel like I've been watching (00:00:34) your interviews with the brothers. I've (00:00:35) seen so much of what you've done, but (00:00:37) this is like the first time you've sat (00:00:39) down separate of the brothers since you (00:00:41) guys got back together and the band got (00:00:43) back together. Who's who's Nick Jonas (00:00:45) today separate of the Jonas Brothers? (00:00:48) >> It's a great question. Uh changes uh (00:00:51) every day, I feel like. You know, I for (00:00:53) those that don't know um that are (00:00:55) watching or listening to this, you know, (00:00:56) in the last couple years, um my life's (00:00:59) changed quite a bit. my my wife and I, (00:01:00) you know, my wife Priyanka, we have a (00:01:02) beautiful uh daughter named Multi Marie (00:01:04) Choper Jonas. Parenthood has has really (00:01:08) changed my life in in so many ways, but (00:01:10) also my perspective and the way I view (00:01:12) myself and um you know, as it relates to (00:01:15) my work as well. Obviously, there's a (00:01:17) huge influence um there as well. And and (00:01:20) so I think I had a better sense of who I (00:01:22) was prior to that and then everything (00:01:24) shifted um once she arrived. What's (00:01:27) great is that I have this this wonderful (00:01:28) outlet in my songwriting and my, you (00:01:31) know, music career where I can speak (00:01:33) about some of the these things that are (00:01:35) happening in my life. And luckily, you (00:01:37) know, our audience both with the (00:01:39) brothers and solo have really grown with (00:01:41) us and they're they're kind of going (00:01:42) through some of the same life (00:01:43) experiences. So, it really is like (00:01:45) speaking to peers and people that that (00:01:47) can understand kind of the language, (00:01:49) right? And and understand just what (00:01:52) you're going through. So, I I felt, you (00:01:53) know, some freedom to to express myself (00:01:56) even more in my work these days. Uh, (00:01:58) which I think is reflected in in my my (00:02:01) latest album, which uh I know we we sent (00:02:03) over before for you to listen to a track (00:02:05) or two just to get some context. But, (00:02:07) you know, I I'm really looking forward (00:02:10) to to people hearing um this work and (00:02:13) and kind of listening to these lyrics (00:02:15) and and getting a window into my life. (00:02:17) >> Yeah, I'm excited to dive into Sunday (00:02:19) Best. I pooked out some of my favorite (00:02:21) lyrics from some of the songs. So, we (00:02:22) we'll get to that. But I wanted to ask (00:02:24) you like go back a little bit. What (00:02:25) you're saying is almost like you started (00:02:27) performing at an age when kids don't (00:02:29) even know who they are. (00:02:30) >> Yeah. (00:02:31) >> And your life was so public. What was (00:02:33) that like now looking back? Like what (00:02:36) was that experience like? (00:02:38) >> Yeah. I started performing when I was (00:02:40) professionally when I was eight. I was (00:02:42) doing Broadway shows as a kid. You know, (00:02:44) our our parents very musical people. her (00:02:46) dad was a a minister in New Jersey at (00:02:48) the time and we were, you know, close (00:02:50) enough to New York City where this dream (00:02:53) of mine to go and perform at the (00:02:54) Broadway stage was actually somewhat of (00:02:56) a a possibility. Uh, and I I happened to (00:02:59) be in a hair salon with my mom uh when I (00:03:01) was like six or seven years old just (00:03:03) singing as I always did, you know, some (00:03:05) show tune. And the woman next to her (00:03:07) leaned over and said, "Hey, my my son is (00:03:09) actually on Broadway right now in Lay (00:03:11) Miz. Your son could do it. You should go (00:03:12) see this manager." So, a couple weeks (00:03:14) later, they drove me and the brothers to (00:03:16) go see this manager named Shirley Grant. (00:03:18) She was this lovely older woman with all (00:03:21) these photos of of kid actors on her (00:03:23) wall um that she had made famous. And um (00:03:26) she was kind of a staple in New Jersey (00:03:28) for for kids that wanted to be in the (00:03:30) business. And I went in and I I (00:03:32) auditioned for her, sang, you know, all (00:03:34) the songs I knew, which was mostly just (00:03:35) pop music. And and then she uh she said, (00:03:38) "Well, there's there's some signs here (00:03:41) that that we could have, you know, a (00:03:43) path ahead of us. Uh but you need to go (00:03:45) learn show tunes." So, I spent 6 months (00:03:47) devastated that it didn't just happen. (00:03:49) Uh you know, my very short-sighted (00:03:51) 7-year-old mind thinking my career was (00:03:52) over. And uh I, you know, started (00:03:55) learning show tunes with my dad and um (00:03:57) came back and auditioned for her again. (00:03:59) And she started sending me on auditions (00:04:01) and eventually I was on the Broadway (00:04:02) stage and and I've really not looked (00:04:04) back since. um went from doing that for (00:04:07) three or four years to recording music (00:04:08) and then you know just the stars kind of (00:04:11) aligning and obviously me and the (00:04:12) brothers had a you know a song that we (00:04:15) wrote we were kids um that someone heard (00:04:17) that label and wanted to sign all three (00:04:19) of us and it just kind of went from (00:04:21) there (00:04:21) >> growing up on Disney in front of (00:04:23) millions like how did that shape your (00:04:26) sense of self now when you reflect back (00:04:28) on it (00:04:29) >> being you know the first family of the (00:04:31) church right my dad was a pastor we were (00:04:33) expected to behave a certain way (00:04:36) expected to be sat in the front pew of (00:04:38) the church every Sunday morning uh with (00:04:40) our tie and you know our our suit on and (00:04:44) there was a lot of eyeballs on us um (00:04:46) which I think was actually great (00:04:47) training ground for what we would then (00:04:49) experience on Disney so many years (00:04:50) later. We didn't expect that to happen. (00:04:52) We we were initially signed to a label (00:04:54) that didn't really know what to do with (00:04:55) us. Um, and we got dropped after our (00:04:58) first album came out and we were, you (00:05:01) know, hundreds of thousands of dollars (00:05:03) in in debt, credit card debt, money that (00:05:05) we did not have cuz there's there's no (00:05:07) uh money in in ministry really. We had (00:05:10) to sort of figure something out. And (00:05:12) thankfully, we got a call from Hollywood (00:05:15) Records, which is, you know, under the (00:05:16) Disney umbrella, and they said, "We know (00:05:18) what to do with with the guys." And and (00:05:20) couple weeks later, they had us on the (00:05:22) Disney Channel, and things just started (00:05:23) going. But the real head scratcher was, (00:05:26) okay, what does it look like when it (00:05:28) goes from just a couple hundred people (00:05:29) in a church with all their eyeballs on (00:05:31) you to millions upon millions of people? (00:05:34) Um, where, you know, you're expected to (00:05:36) sort of behave a certain way. Uh, I (00:05:39) think our parents did a great job. Uh, (00:05:41) we all turned out somewhat okay, I (00:05:43) think. But you, you know, you see the (00:05:45) stories. We've all seen the stories of (00:05:47) of people that have really struggled (00:05:48) coming out of that um or while they're (00:05:50) in it. And um I think it's a credit to (00:05:52) their their parenting. (00:05:54) >> Yeah, I've met your parents. They're (00:05:55) wonderful people. Yeah. Yeah. They're (00:05:57) great energy and you can see where you (00:05:58) three get it from. But yeah, it's it's (00:06:01) even that early failure. I mean, to be (00:06:03) failing at that age, to be dropped from (00:06:05) a record label, tons of debt. Like when (00:06:08) I hear that, I go, (00:06:10) >> okay, when you look at it from today's (00:06:11) perspective, you're like, oh yeah, of (00:06:13) course they they made it anyway. It (00:06:14) didn't matter. But it's like at that (00:06:15) time I can imagine that being really (00:06:17) heavy on your family on was it quick (00:06:20) enough a pivot where Hollywood Records (00:06:22) came or was it (00:06:23) >> did you have to sit in that pain for a (00:06:25) little bit? (00:06:26) >> You know there was a a couple things (00:06:27) happening in our life at that time that (00:06:29) made you know the career aspect aspect (00:06:32) of it almost feel uh less of a burden (00:06:36) than some of the personal things that (00:06:38) were going on. You know our dad was at (00:06:40) that church for 10 years. It was a real (00:06:42) um you know safety net for us and and a (00:06:46) place where we we felt a part of a (00:06:47) community and some of the the families (00:06:50) that were there prior to our arrival um (00:06:54) did not like my dad and and u made it (00:06:57) their mission to get him pushed out of (00:06:58) the church. So (00:06:59) >> effectively, you know, he he lost his (00:07:01) job while also funding this this ban, (00:07:05) this dream of ours. Um, we had to move (00:07:07) out of our home because we were living (00:07:08) in the the church parsonage which is (00:07:10) owned by the church. And so we we moved (00:07:12) into a basically a a little house in a (00:07:16) place called Little Falls, New Jersey. (00:07:17) The owners of the home were kind enough (00:07:19) to let us rent it from them for for (00:07:21) basically nothing while we were in this (00:07:23) transitional period. And around the same (00:07:26) time, while we're on tour doing uh a (00:07:28) school tour, basically we would show up (00:07:29) at 8 a.m., load in our own gear, and (00:07:32) play a 30-minute uh assembly basically. (00:07:34) And then there was an anti-drug school (00:07:36) uh anti-drug message at the end of it (00:07:38) that our our uncle Josh, who was our (00:07:40) tour manager, would give. You know, (00:07:41) around this time, I'm I'm starting to (00:07:43) lose weight. I'm, you know, thirsty all (00:07:46) the time. I'm using the bathroom all the (00:07:47) time. And um kind of just thought it was (00:07:50) a growth spurt or or that I was just, (00:07:52) you know, going through puberty. Um (00:07:55) obviously, it wasn't that. Uh it was a (00:07:57) diabetes diagnosis. So it all kind of (00:08:00) collided at the same time and you know (00:08:02) looked up and and life just looked very (00:08:03) different. And so it it took a lot of (00:08:06) faith and uh even questioning faith at (00:08:10) that time going from the safety net of (00:08:12) the church to all of a sudden being sort (00:08:14) of betrayed by them and having to (00:08:16) redefine relationship with God while (00:08:18) going through some of your toughest (00:08:19) moments. It's weird weird time, but we (00:08:21) we we came out of it okay. Um and that (00:08:24) phone call from from Disney kind of (00:08:26) changed our our life. (00:08:28) >> Yeah. I mean, it's interesting that you (00:08:29) put it into perspective that like losing (00:08:31) a record deal compared to your dad (00:08:34) losing his job, you know, the faith (00:08:37) challenges that's happening, you going (00:08:38) through diabetes. It's like it's (00:08:41) interesting when you look at your life (00:08:42) like that and everything's put into (00:08:43) perspective. I just had a friend who's (00:08:44) an author. (00:08:45) >> She just had a book come out and she was (00:08:47) talking to me about how before the book (00:08:49) came out, all she was thinking about was (00:08:51) book sales and data and if she'd get on (00:08:54) the New York Times and all this kind of (00:08:55) stuff that you think about. Yeah. And (00:08:57) then she had a family go through a (00:08:58) health scare and her partner went (00:09:00) through a health scare and it was really (00:09:02) serious and she was just saying that she (00:09:04) was in one sense grateful that that (00:09:05) happened before because it just (00:09:07) completely made her zoom out and the (00:09:09) perspective completely changed and she (00:09:11) wasn't worried about all those things (00:09:12) that we would naturally be worried (00:09:13) about. What did you do as a family and (00:09:16) what did you do individually at that (00:09:17) time to kind of keep that faith as you (00:09:20) said like what were those challenging (00:09:22) questions you were asking? What were the (00:09:24) things coming at you that you were then (00:09:26) able to find your center of grounding? (00:09:28) What what helped you do that at that (00:09:30) time? (00:09:30) >> Writing music. Um, our parents got us a (00:09:35) a V drum kit, which is an electronic (00:09:37) drum kit. Um, where you could hook up (00:09:39) your iPod and play along to the track. (00:09:41) So, it was kind of the way that I (00:09:42) learned how to play drums. And in that (00:09:44) basement that that drum set was kept in, (00:09:46) we also had a, you know, a little guitar (00:09:47) rig and a keyboard. And you know, I was (00:09:50) I was growing up going through life (00:09:53) stuff, right? First love, first date, (00:09:56) all these kind of things that are really (00:09:58) good found or are a very good foundation (00:10:00) to to write music. You know, we had we (00:10:02) had a good sense of what we wanted the (00:10:04) next record to sound like. (00:10:05) >> We didn't know if we'd be able to make (00:10:06) one because things were not going so (00:10:08) well, but we just kept writing. We went (00:10:11) down there every day and and tried to (00:10:13) write the best song we could. And we (00:10:15) came out with a demo from that chapter (00:10:17) of our our sort of toughest window as a (00:10:19) family nine to 10 months. Um, came with (00:10:22) a demo CD with with 11 songs that would (00:10:25) then become the self-titled album that (00:10:27) we released that that connected and and (00:10:30) went on to sell, you know, millions of (00:10:32) of units and really redefined our our (00:10:34) career and our life. Uh but it was born (00:10:36) out of this incredible struggle that we (00:10:39) were going through and and um kind of (00:10:41) desperation almost uh which I don't (00:10:44) think is a great uh way to to to write (00:10:47) from great place to write from but (00:10:49) sometimes it it is the fire you need to (00:10:51) to sort of get over that hurdle and when (00:10:54) I listen back to those songs now I I (00:10:55) still really resonate with uh some of (00:10:57) the messages in there and and even you (00:10:59) know the age appropriate writing. I (00:11:01) think (00:11:01) >> our dad was really great at encouraging (00:11:03) us to (00:11:04) >> to listen to the the greats, you know, (00:11:06) the Eagles, the Beatles, Beeges, uh (00:11:09) Stevie Wonder, but also to to like what (00:11:12) we liked. And at that time, you know, (00:11:14) 2004, 2005, the sort of emo pop punk (00:11:19) scene was was massive. and we really (00:11:21) responded to I think some of the angst (00:11:23) in the music because we were teens who (00:11:25) were going through this stuff and uh (00:11:27) also navigating dating and and all those (00:11:30) other things. And so we started kind of (00:11:32) infusing that into our sound and it it (00:11:34) really became uh a crucial part of the (00:11:36) the early records for us. And obviously (00:11:38) as as we've evolved so has the sound but (00:11:41) um I think back on on those times uh (00:11:44) even amidst the struggle with a lot of (00:11:47) uh you know appreciation. (00:11:49) >> Yeah. just it always I I love learning (00:11:52) that because it just constantly points (00:11:53) to how when you're going through tough (00:11:55) times, creating and building and doing (00:11:58) something and taking action is (00:12:01) >> always half the solution (00:12:03) >> in terms of like getting momentum moving (00:12:05) forward. Trying to (00:12:07) >> create, build, grow, do something just (00:12:10) allows humans to break through these (00:12:12) really difficult times that go on in (00:12:13) life. Looking back, was there a (00:12:15) challenge growing up as a Jonas brother (00:12:18) and not just as Nick? (00:12:20) >> Finding your own identity amidst uh a (00:12:24) group is always tough. That's that's not (00:12:26) unique to us. That's any siblings, (00:12:28) right? go through something uh like that (00:12:30) where where they've got to find their (00:12:31) own identity and and even you know their (00:12:34) their place in the family for each of us (00:12:37) being sort of labeled a thing cuz it's (00:12:40) the easiest way for people to sort of (00:12:42) digest a new band is to say he's the (00:12:44) this one he's the this one and it got (00:12:46) tiring you know because I'm I'm sort of (00:12:48) inherently like a a pretty reserved (00:12:51) person. Um, I think the people that know (00:12:52) me best would say that I'm actually (00:12:54) quite outgoing once you get to know me. (00:12:56) But, but I think that I sort of created (00:12:59) a a a label for myself because I was (00:13:01) being told that I was the shy one or (00:13:05) >> interesting (00:13:05) >> um, you know, whatever it was at that (00:13:07) time or the sort of creative moody one. (00:13:09) and these these labels like they do (00:13:12) stick with you as as you get older and (00:13:14) and so I think when I got into my sort (00:13:17) of late teens and early 20s especially (00:13:20) as I started to explore sort of my (00:13:22) identity as a solo artist uh and as as (00:13:25) an an adult um I tried to shed that and (00:13:28) when I look back on it now uh as a as a (00:13:30) person in my 30s I can kind of like (00:13:32) laugh at the stages of of life and how (00:13:35) those early labels and trying to find my (00:13:38) identity amidst (00:13:39) this group um you know really shaped who (00:13:42) I became. (00:13:43) >> Yeah. Yeah. And you see that across like (00:13:45) musicians, actors, athletes as well (00:13:47) where like they get a label and now (00:13:49) you're almost playing the caricature of (00:13:51) that label. (00:13:52) >> Yeah. (00:13:53) >> And and having to because a there's some (00:13:55) success attached to it, but like you (00:13:56) said, you're just a young person still (00:13:58) figuring out who you are. It's easy to (00:14:00) be the thing that everyone thinks you (00:14:02) are. How how do you think that that was (00:14:04) limiting and in what ways was it (00:14:05) actually helpful? the ways in which it (00:14:07) was limiting were that um you start to (00:14:10) sort of subscribe to it as well. uh and (00:14:13) then it becomes a part of your your (00:14:14) selft talk you know I I was not (00:14:16) regularly in therapy um in my teens I (00:14:20) think because our dad was from you know (00:14:23) a ministry background there was sort of (00:14:26) a taboo around it we would we would (00:14:28) often uh you know refer to sort of (00:14:30) therapy as as more like a counseling (00:14:32) session with a person in the church (00:14:35) throughout those years following our (00:14:37) exit from the church uh I really (00:14:40) questioned faith and and what (00:14:43) relationship I would have to sort of (00:14:45) organized religion at all, which is (00:14:47) something that I can I can say now (00:14:48) knowing that my relationship with my God (00:14:50) is totally intact and that my belief is (00:14:53) totally intact. Um, and I think it's (00:14:56) important for everyone to go on sort of (00:14:57) that journey of of self-discovery. But (00:14:59) during that time, I think we could have (00:15:01) all benefited from sort of a more uh (00:15:05) traditional um mental health uh sort of (00:15:09) approach. So that's that's how it's (00:15:11) limiting um to answer that question and (00:15:13) then how it helped (00:15:14) >> uh it made me really tough. (00:15:16) >> I have nothing to complain about in my (00:15:18) life because (00:15:19) >> I am eternally grateful (00:15:22) >> uh for every thing that has been um (00:15:25) given to me, every experience I've been (00:15:27) afforded and I understand that I I walk (00:15:30) in uh in privilege and um so I'm I'm (00:15:34) grateful for that. That being said, life (00:15:36) does still throw you curveballs and (00:15:38) there are things that are challenging. (00:15:39) I'm grateful for the grit that I had to (00:15:43) take on because living a public life (00:15:46) comes with these things. Comes with the (00:15:49) very good, the things that we all think (00:15:51) are are glamorous and and amazing and (00:15:53) also with some [ __ ] that you got to (00:15:55) navigate. And um whether it's family or (00:15:58) friends or just sheer determination and (00:16:00) grit, that's I think the positive I I (00:16:03) pulled from it. (00:16:04) >> Yeah. Thank thanks for saying that (00:16:06) because I think what I'm encouraging all (00:16:08) our listeners to do as well is think (00:16:10) about how all life experiences are both (00:16:12) limiting and helpful. And I think as (00:16:14) humans we have this ability to paint and (00:16:16) experience all bad or all good. (00:16:18) >> Yeah. (00:16:18) >> And and the reality is no, there's (00:16:20) nuance there and there's gray and (00:16:22) there's it's good to be able to reflect (00:16:23) on something that was tough and go (00:16:25) actually I've got a lot of great stuff (00:16:26) from that too. Yeah. Like in so many (00:16:28) ways that's what's made me strong and (00:16:30) resilient and ready for the future. At (00:16:32) the same time, I'm aware that hey, it (00:16:34) would have been great to have some (00:16:35) traditional therapy or, you know, some (00:16:38) things at that time. And I think having (00:16:39) that approach is so helpful. What was (00:16:41) romanticized about the Disney era that (00:16:44) now you look back on and go that was (00:16:46) probably not that healthy? (00:16:48) >> Well, I mean, it's it's global exposure. (00:16:50) And when they turn, I call it the (00:16:52) faucet. When Disney turns the faucet on, (00:16:54) >> it just goes, right? and and when they (00:16:57) know they have something that has (00:16:59) potential to be successful, they are the (00:17:02) best team and company to market that to (00:17:05) the audience that they've spoken to with (00:17:08) such excellence for as long as they have (00:17:10) >> at that time. Um, you had a pretty uh (00:17:16) incredible graduating class. I mean, if (00:17:18) you look at the success that everyone (00:17:21) from that kind of era has had post (00:17:23) Disney, (00:17:24) >> I think it says more about their ability (00:17:25) to find talent that has legs that that (00:17:28) has the potential for for real adult (00:17:31) success in addition to the success on (00:17:33) the channel. What I romanticize about it (00:17:37) and what I think back on (00:17:39) is those elements. the the idea that (00:17:42) there's this big company that can just (00:17:44) make things happen and it's exciting (00:17:45) when it does, but also now, you know, (00:17:49) being a part of a thing like a Camp (00:17:51) Rock, for instance, is, you know, really (00:17:54) incredible. Um, I think for a while as I (00:17:58) was trying to solidify myself as an (00:18:01) adult performer and creative person, (00:18:03) some of those things from our our Disney (00:18:05) past were like embarrassing, like uh (00:18:07) like looking back at a yearbook would be (00:18:09) for somebody. Um, now I'm just so proud (00:18:13) to have been a part of something that (00:18:14) had the global reach that that that had (00:18:17) or or other projects we did with them. (00:18:19) And it isn't until you're, you know, (00:18:21) you're grown and and you've sort of (00:18:24) you're on the other side of that that (00:18:26) you can see that perspective. And yeah, (00:18:28) I just I look at it and go, "Wow, those (00:18:30) kids were fearless." (00:18:32) >> All of us, and really had had no formal (00:18:34) training or I mean, it shows in some (00:18:37) cases. Um, (00:18:39) >> but it's the best training ground there (00:18:41) is. (00:18:41) >> Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. If someone said (00:18:44) today, Nick, you're you're shy, you're (00:18:45) moody, you're the creative one, what (00:18:47) would you how would you react to that? (00:18:48) >> I would say uh you're right uh to some (00:18:52) degree, but I don't know, you sit and (00:18:54) break bread with me or have a drink, (00:18:56) you'll see pretty quickly that uh I like (00:19:00) to have a laugh. I you know I I am (00:19:03) thoughtful (00:19:04) >> in the way that I respond to questions (00:19:05) and the things that come out of my mouth (00:19:07) I know bear consequences or bear fruit, (00:19:11) right? There's there's good uh to be (00:19:14) had. There's also times that you say a (00:19:16) thing you didn't mean to say or you make (00:19:18) a joke that doesn't quite land right and (00:19:20) you know you you fall flat on your face (00:19:22) and we've all had those moments. (00:19:24) >> Um two things can be true. I can be the (00:19:27) person I was as a as a team where I was (00:19:28) given that label, but I can also evolve (00:19:30) and become this other sort of more (00:19:32) dynamic person that I I strive to be. (00:19:35) >> Yeah, absolutely. I'm glad you said (00:19:36) that. And I I feel like when we were at (00:19:38) dinner, you were always the one sparking (00:19:40) off really thoughtful conversations and (00:19:42) like, you know, getting us all kind of (00:19:44) like discussing something interesting. (00:19:46) And I'm like, and and hearing you say (00:19:48) that, I mean, I think about my (00:19:50) experience in a much more smaller way (00:19:51) than you. But I've always felt that like (00:19:53) because of what I do for work and (00:19:55) because of my who I am online, which is (00:19:58) who I am. It's just a part of me. I (00:20:00) often feel everyone's like, "Oh, well, (00:20:01) Jay takes life really seriously and he (00:20:03) can't joke around." And I'm like, my (00:20:04) friends who know me the best know that (00:20:06) all I want to do is banter and like rip (00:20:08) into someone because that's who I am (00:20:09) behind the scenes. And that's who I (00:20:11) truly am. And obviously that isn't (00:20:13) >> it's not that it's misaligned with my (00:20:15) work. It's just we're all these 360° (00:20:18) people, but because we watch everyone (00:20:20) for 30 seconds on a TikTok or a real, (00:20:22) you kind of become this very simplified (00:20:25) version of yourself. (00:20:26) >> Yeah, it's so true. And there are times (00:20:29) now I feel like I I watch back certain (00:20:31) interviews that I've done in the past (00:20:33) and I try not to be ultra critical of (00:20:37) myself. I am. We all are, I feel like. (00:20:40) But I I sort of have this yearbook that (00:20:42) lives out in the world, you know, I (00:20:45) can't kind of control (00:20:47) um that that's just part of the thing. (00:20:49) But I I often will watch back interviews (00:20:51) and go, hm, I can see where I was like (00:20:53) projecting what I wanted people to think (00:20:56) of me um or, you know, I'm withholding a (00:20:59) hot take or an opinion that I think (00:21:02) might get me in trouble. I've been (00:21:04) fortunate enough to have not misstepped (00:21:07) in my life to uh in a way that would (00:21:10) limit my ability to continue to do what (00:21:12) I'm doing. We are all capable of making (00:21:14) mistakes. Um and I feel like, you know, (00:21:18) having having the world get to sort of (00:21:21) see into my my life has been both uh (00:21:25) wonderful and and also really (00:21:27) frightening at times. (00:21:28) >> Yeah. Yeah. So, I try to live honestly (00:21:31) and just, you know, lay it out for (00:21:33) people now because I think it's it's (00:21:36) just way easier to connect. And so, to (00:21:37) your point about the dinner (00:21:38) conversations, I love the freedom of (00:21:42) having great in-depth intense (00:21:45) conversations with friends and having a (00:21:47) laugh as well. I'm getting more and more (00:21:49) comfortable kind of fully being myself (00:21:52) uh for the world to see as well. (00:21:54) >> Yeah. Yeah. I like the way you put it (00:21:55) though. It's like the world has access (00:21:57) to your yearbook. (00:21:58) >> Yeah. (00:21:59) >> And and that's a that's a really (00:22:01) interesting way to think about it. Based (00:22:02) on what you just said, actually, I (00:22:03) wanted to pull out a lyric here that I (00:22:05) heard from Yeah. So, you you were just (00:22:07) saying there that often when you look (00:22:09) back at your interviews, you can look (00:22:11) back and we can be critical and (00:22:13) negative. And you write in your new (00:22:15) single, Gut Punch. I'm going to read (00:22:16) your lyrics back to you if that's okay. (00:22:19) Sure. (00:22:19) >> Uh you said, "Hit me like a gut punch. I (00:22:21) hurt my own feelings. How did I get so (00:22:23) good at being mean to myself? I should (00:22:26) turn the heat down. Tell myself to chill (00:22:27) out. Damn, I really hate the way I talk (00:22:29) to myself. Now, what would it be like if (00:22:32) I just tried to be nice to the person (00:22:33) that I'm seeing in the mirror? If you (00:22:36) find that inner child, haven't seen him (00:22:38) for a while, let him know he's doing (00:22:40) fine. And I feel like like when I hear (00:22:44) that, I'm like, "Yeah, I can I can (00:22:46) relate to it." You've got a lot more (00:22:48) material to kind of be critical of (00:22:51) yourself for that's visible to other (00:22:52) people as well. When did you first (00:22:54) become aware of the inner critic that (00:22:57) was so strong? Like when did you start (00:22:59) to recognize, wait a minute, I can be (00:23:00) quite hard on myself? (00:23:02) >> I think after I was diagnosed with type (00:23:04) 1 diabetes, um a major shift happened in (00:23:07) my life. Uh where (00:23:10) I I never believed that I did anything (00:23:14) to get diabetes. For those that don't (00:23:16) know, type one is an autoimmune disease. (00:23:18) It's not the same as type two, which can (00:23:20) be caused from a number of things, but (00:23:22) poor eating habits, lack of exercise (00:23:23) would be sort of the main cause of type (00:23:25) two. Whereas type one, your body just (00:23:27) decides it's going to stop making (00:23:28) insulin naturally. And so then your (00:23:31) glucose levels are it's not possible for (00:23:33) them to be in range, which has a number (00:23:35) of major side effects. And and I think (00:23:38) the biggest misconception which I I've (00:23:40) tried to be a part of, you know, (00:23:42) educating people on cuz I know it's (00:23:44) really just an education issue and and (00:23:46) not there's no bias per se. Um just (00:23:49) people don't know that it can be deadly (00:23:51) if it's not treated. So when I (00:23:55) reflected, you know, this is when I (00:23:57) first started doing therapy in my early (00:23:59) 20s, uh on kind of the way in which I (00:24:02) handled living with this disease. (00:24:05) um I became very critical of (00:24:09) how serious I was taking it (00:24:11) >> um or even the opposite end of that (00:24:15) spectrum which is am I taking it too (00:24:17) seriously. (00:24:19) You know, at that time there was there's (00:24:20) a lot of uh a lot of noise made about it (00:24:24) because I was sort of the only public (00:24:28) person talking about type one in this (00:24:30) way as an advocate and I became really (00:24:34) discouraged by some of the feedback. (00:24:35) This was the first time I recall (00:24:39) feeling, and I'm going to use a big word (00:24:40) here, and I don't mean for it to sound (00:24:42) uh so intense, but feeling betrayed by (00:24:45) people um in the sense that I wanted to (00:24:50) just be a normal kid like everybody else (00:24:52) and not be dealing with this thing. I (00:24:53) wasn't trying to make a meal out of it. (00:24:55) I'm just sharing my truth about this. (00:24:57) And it was made to feel like, oh, he's (00:24:58) making too big a deal (00:25:00) >> and it's not that serious. And so I I (00:25:02) became very critical of like everything (00:25:04) I was doing in that sense, whether I was (00:25:06) doing enough to manage it or not enough. (00:25:08) And and then later on, you know, in in (00:25:12) my life, I I was met with a situation (00:25:14) where I really kind of fell flat on my (00:25:16) face. Uh not literally, but that that (00:25:19) would have been better actually than (00:25:20) what happened. But I had a TV (00:25:21) performance where this guitar solo (00:25:23) moment that I was supposed to play as a (00:25:25) feature on a Kelsey Ballerini track just (00:25:28) didn't didn't happen. Like I I went (00:25:30) blank. uh I I hit a bad note and then I (00:25:32) couldn't kind recover and I I built up (00:25:35) this (00:25:37) this skyscraper of (00:25:40) you know this this idea that music and (00:25:42) being a musician was my whole identity (00:25:44) and it was it was unimaginable how how (00:25:47) important that was to me for that (00:25:51) skyscraper to stay standing and and and (00:25:54) not have any cracks in it or anything. (00:25:55) and and um I I had to sort of relearn (00:26:00) who I was if you took this thing away. (00:26:02) Uh it'd be like taking my singing voice (00:26:04) away. I who am I? What do I do? And it (00:26:06) it was just a a really tough season in (00:26:09) my life. And everything I did after (00:26:10) that, I was just incredibly critical of (00:26:12) myself. And then I started to do that (00:26:15) thing where you you make the joke before (00:26:18) others can. Um you sort of you think (00:26:20) it's already in the room before you (00:26:21) arrive. So, you have to and no one was (00:26:24) thinking about it. And that's been true (00:26:26) a number of times in my life where I (00:26:28) feel like something's happened that (00:26:29) didn't go the way I wanted it to and (00:26:31) that everyone's talking about it. And (00:26:33) so, there's that wrestle of like, am I (00:26:35) am I just a narcissist thinking that (00:26:37) this is as important to everybody else? (00:26:39) Maybe. Yeah. And then it's it's just a (00:26:41) cyclical thing. (00:26:43) >> And so, the gut punch lyrics (00:26:46) were really important to me because it's (00:26:47) the first time I' I've been able to say (00:26:49) this thing that I've felt for a long (00:26:51) time. Um, and it wasn't until we got to (00:26:53) the bridge where I I I wrote that line. (00:26:56) My co-writers in the song are amazing (00:26:57) and really allowed for me to be this (00:27:00) honest. I felt kind of similar the way I (00:27:03) do with you, which is that I can I can (00:27:05) speak more freely. Um, because you've (00:27:07) created the environment for me to do (00:27:09) that feels welcoming and and warm to (00:27:12) that. And they did the same thing. and (00:27:15) and I just started talking about, you (00:27:20) know, I said my I think my hair stopped (00:27:21) growing. Is that even a thing? I haven't (00:27:24) lost any of it, but something ain't the (00:27:26) same. Maybe it's a metaphor is even that (00:27:28) deep. I think my hair stopped growing or (00:27:29) or is it me? And it was sort of like a a (00:27:33) poem that I had wrote in the mirror that (00:27:35) morning and it was funny at first. It (00:27:38) made me chuckle and then I realized when (00:27:39) it got to the or is it me part like oh (00:27:41) that's what it's about. like I I (00:27:43) actually was surprised that I was I was (00:27:46) willing to be that uh honest. Um a thing (00:27:49) maybe I didn't want to say out loud. (00:27:51) Anyway, got to the bridge and that that (00:27:53) lyric is my favorite on the album which (00:27:55) is about the inner child because I feel (00:27:56) like as I mentioned before that kid was (00:28:00) fearless and he was just doing it. Um (00:28:03) and I I'd love to spend some time with (00:28:05) him again because I I admire his his (00:28:08) grit, his uh fearlessness. I feel like (00:28:11) I've (00:28:12) I've reverted to like factory settings (00:28:14) or something and and maybe I need to I (00:28:16) don't know. But he's he's cool. (00:28:18) >> Push it, bend it, flex it. Introducing (00:28:21) the latest rule bending innovation from (00:28:23) Brooks Running. 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(00:29:12) Shop now at brooksunning.com. (00:29:15) It's so fascinating to me that we first (00:29:18) judge ourselves for mistakes or things (00:29:21) that we call mistakes. Then we judge (00:29:23) ourselves for judging ourselves because (00:29:24) then we're like, "Wait a minute. Why am (00:29:25) I judging myself for judging myself? (00:29:28) That makes me even worse." (00:29:29) >> Yeah. And now you're like three (00:29:32) judgments deep on (00:29:35) judging yourself for feeling shame and (00:29:36) guilt and then judging yourself for the (00:29:38) fact that you're judging yourself for (00:29:39) having shame and guilt. And and it feels (00:29:41) like a very everything you just said (00:29:43) feels like a very real emotion that each (00:29:44) and every one of us can resonate with, (00:29:46) right? I'm sure everyone who's listening (00:29:48) right now (00:29:49) >> can go, "Yeah, I've had moments like (00:29:50) that when (00:29:51) >> I didn't feel like I did the right thing (00:29:53) and then all of a sudden everyone had a (00:29:54) viewpoint on it." And whether you have (00:29:56) the world watch watching you or you have (00:29:58) your 10 friends or 20 friends in school (00:30:00) watching you, proportionately it feels (00:30:03) the same. (00:30:04) >> Yeah. (00:30:05) >> Uh you know, and it it can be so (00:30:07) challenging. And (00:30:08) >> when you when you're saying that out (00:30:09) loud to me, I'm like, what would you say (00:30:11) to that younger self now if you could (00:30:13) spend some time with him? And what would (00:30:15) you not say to that younger self if you (00:30:17) could spend some time with him? (00:30:19) >> Yeah, I would. I would. (00:30:21) >> Well, just just to circle back to one (00:30:22) thing you said, please. Yeah. Yeah. This (00:30:25) music and these stories and they're all (00:30:27) human experiences. It has nothing to do (00:30:29) with it being specific to my life other (00:30:31) than it's, you know, my wife and (00:30:33) daughter that I'm talking about or or (00:30:34) other situations. But I really wanted to (00:30:37) to make something that everyone could (00:30:38) relate to in their own way. That's one (00:30:40) thing. And the thing I would say to my (00:30:44) younger self is, you know, (00:30:46) congratulations, you get to marry (00:30:48) Priyanka Chopra Jones. Um, that's pretty (00:30:52) cool. Uh, (00:30:54) and also, you know, your daughter is (00:30:56) incredible. She's just she's magic in (00:30:59) every every sense of the word. Um, she (00:31:02) just turned four a couple weeks ago. Uh, (00:31:06) blows my mind, you know? I look at her (00:31:08) and and (00:31:10) I can I can see (00:31:13) her future like I I just know she's (00:31:15) going to do amazing things. Um, and I (00:31:19) I'm (00:31:21) all struck that I get to experience her (00:31:24) magic. (00:31:26) >> That's beautiful, man. I love hearing (00:31:28) that. (00:31:29) >> That's so special. And happy belated (00:31:30) birthday. (00:31:31) >> Yeah. That's so beautiful. (00:31:35) I can see that got you a little (00:31:37) >> Yeah, for sure. (00:31:41) >> What's going through your mind? (00:31:44) Um, no, she's she's just perfect in (00:31:47) every way. And you know, every parent (00:31:48) says that, but uh you know, this morning (00:31:51) I was actually at her new uh preschool. (00:31:54) To sort of be back there in the context (00:31:56) of being a dad, you know, just a wild (00:31:58) thing. And (00:32:00) you know, she she came to the world (00:32:02) under sort of very intense (00:32:04) circumstances, which I've not really (00:32:06) talked about ever. We were expecting her (00:32:09) to arrive in April of the year she was (00:32:11) born. and uh we get a call (00:32:16) that it's going to be sooner. So we we (00:32:18) basically you know went into action and (00:32:21) and um she was born via surrogate and so (00:32:26) we got to the hospital and um she came (00:32:30) out she was 1b 11 oz and (00:32:34) you know purple basically. Um (00:32:38) they these angels at the NICU kind of (00:32:41) resuscitated her in that moment and um (00:32:46) you know got her taken care of really (00:32:50) quickly and intubated and everything (00:32:51) else and and so um because it was co (00:32:55) times my wife and I we would basically (00:32:58) um do 12-hour shifts at the hospital for (00:33:01) uh 3 and 1/2 months. I could still sort (00:33:04) of like smell it. You know, there's (00:33:06) always visceral things. It's it's was (00:33:09) both comforting and frightening to be (00:33:11) there every day and to see sort of other (00:33:13) families going through similar (00:33:14) situations. Um but she fought every day (00:33:18) uh for three and a half months and you (00:33:21) know slowly started to gain some weight (00:33:23) and after six blood transfusions she was (00:33:28) she was doing great and and uh (00:33:32) you know we got to take her home after 3 (00:33:34) and a half months and I feel like she (00:33:36) knows how she entered the world and what (00:33:39) that first chapter of her life was like (00:33:41) and so every day is a gift and you can (00:33:43) actually feel it on her um in the way (00:33:47) that she behaves and how (00:33:50) exciting everything is. I don't know how (00:33:52) much I she remembers probably nothing. (00:33:55) Um but spiritually I believe that (00:33:57) there's there's gratitude in her and uh (00:34:02) you know she's she's incredible. (00:34:04) >> I mean thank you for sharing that with (00:34:06) us. That's I feel like that's the behind (00:34:07) the scenes that no one has a clue about (00:34:09) and you know we're not aware of. and (00:34:12) talk to me about the conversations that (00:34:14) you and Priyanka are having because I (00:34:16) think the part that people forget when (00:34:19) you have a child that's going through (00:34:20) any sort of difficulty is that you're (00:34:23) obviously worried about the child but (00:34:24) then it also affects the relationship (00:34:25) with your partner because you're both (00:34:27) worried about the child. What were the (00:34:29) kind of conversations you were having (00:34:31) that was (00:34:32) >> helping you both and supporting you (00:34:34) both? (00:34:35) >> We had a lot of tough conversations day (00:34:38) in day out about caring for her. um you (00:34:42) know trying to trying to care for each (00:34:44) other and for her and focusing on not (00:34:47) getting overwhelmed. Uh it can all just (00:34:50) feel so big and parenthood in general is (00:34:53) is it's a lot for everybody, you know, (00:34:56) especially in those early stages of your (00:34:58) kids' life. And this just became about (00:35:00) staying emotionally tough and being (00:35:03) there for each other. uh if you need to (00:35:06) to cry, you know, that shoulder is is (00:35:09) there and ready to to cry on. If you (00:35:10) need to just have a laugh for a minute (00:35:12) just to take your mind off, try to (00:35:14) provide that for the other person. A lot (00:35:15) of give and take from both of us. And uh (00:35:19) you know, my my wife is just as as you (00:35:22) know, she's a brilliant, brilliant woman (00:35:25) with a ton of heart and perspective. and (00:35:28) the way in which he handled it was so (00:35:31) inspiring to me and (00:35:34) uh you know allowing for those those (00:35:36) days to be tough but to be tougher for (00:35:39) our little girl (00:35:41) >> um was the focus. (00:35:43) >> Was was there something you'd share with (00:35:46) other couples who go through their own (00:35:48) version of that that you think would be (00:35:51) really helpful to them? The thing that (00:35:53) helped us the most was being patient (00:35:58) with each other. It is hard sometimes (00:36:00) when you're feeling emotional to sort of (00:36:02) access that logical brain to say we need (00:36:05) to be patient. We need to to just meet (00:36:08) your person where they are in that (00:36:09) moment. And that that goes both ways. (00:36:12) And so, (00:36:14) you know, being patient with your your (00:36:16) partner is is crucial. Yeah, I can (00:36:18) imagine those 12-hour shifts back to (00:36:20) back for 3 months felt like they lasted (00:36:23) forever. (00:36:24) >> Yeah, (00:36:24) >> I can feel like it it didn't feel like 3 (00:36:26) months. It must have felt like it's (00:36:28) never ending. (00:36:29) >> Well, it's not the kind of thing that (00:36:30) you ever want to find a routine doing. (00:36:32) You know, it's it's bizarre when you're (00:36:35) when you're used to uh (00:36:38) going to the hospital every day, you (00:36:39) know. It's it's a like a tough reality (00:36:43) check when that (00:36:44) >> because she had to be kept in hospital, (00:36:45) right? (00:36:45) >> Yeah. She was in the NICU for 3 and 1/2 (00:36:47) months. Yeah. So, (00:36:50) you know, just driving there and back (00:36:51) each day and and seeing each other sort (00:36:53) of as passing ships was a crazy thing. (00:36:57) And I'll just say this about the NICU (00:37:01) nurses. They are truly angels. And (00:37:04) we've, you know, seen a few at some of (00:37:07) our shows. Priyanka spoke about this (00:37:11) experience once before in in an (00:37:13) interview and so some people knew and (00:37:15) and so there was some NICU nurses at a (00:37:17) couple of the shows and it was hold up (00:37:19) the sign and it makes me cry every time (00:37:21) I see it cuz they're they're angels and (00:37:24) we actually got to have some of the (00:37:26) nurses that were taking care of Malty (00:37:28) Marie come out to a show and I met them (00:37:31) um after or sorry just before and it was (00:37:35) uh yeah incredible to And I got to show (00:37:39) them a photo of her now. She's She's no (00:37:42) longer 1 lb 11 oz. (00:37:44) >> Yeah. (00:37:45) >> Beautiful, healthy little four-year-old (00:37:46) girl. (00:37:47) >> I love that. Has she been out to see (00:37:49) some of you? (00:37:50) >> She has. Yeah. (00:37:51) >> Yeah. She um she loves our song, Love Me (00:37:54) to Heaven. (00:37:55) >> She sings it at the top of her lungs. (00:37:56) And basically, she's got the bug (00:37:58) already. She wants to be on stage. And (00:37:59) so Priyanka has to stand side with her (00:38:02) holding her dress back so she doesn't (00:38:04) run on the stage with us. she doesn't (00:38:05) quite understand that that you know she (00:38:07) she can't join just yet. Um (00:38:09) >> but I'm sure she will someday. (00:38:11) >> Yeah. I love that you you spoke about (00:38:13) how you know you congratulate your (00:38:16) younger self for marrying Bria which I (00:38:19) love and I think you guys have been (00:38:21) married for what seven years now? (00:38:22) >> Seven years. (00:38:22) >> Yeah. Seven years. (00:38:24) >> And I wanted to ask you because your (00:38:26) relationship is so special even even (00:38:27) from the outside in and for those who (00:38:29) don't know you I think everyone you know (00:38:31) loves that. What did you know from the (00:38:33) moment you met? Like was it that early (00:38:35) and that clear? Is it one of those if (00:38:37) you know you know when you know you (00:38:39) know? (00:38:39) >> In some ways um you know I was first (00:38:43) kind of introduced to Priyanka (00:38:47) uh by way of seeing her billboard on (00:38:48) Sunset Boulevard for her show Quantico. (00:38:51) And I was like wow she's stunning is (00:38:54) what I thought. And I was doing this (00:38:57) movie with this guy who had just worked (00:38:58) with her and he said hey you know you (00:39:00) guys would really hit it off but he (00:39:01) never connected us. (00:39:02) >> Mhm. So after a few months of waiting to (00:39:05) be connected, I I got impatient and went (00:39:06) on Twitter and saw she followed me, (00:39:09) which she claims we followed each other. (00:39:10) I didn't, but I saw she followed me. So (00:39:12) I I DM'd her and we messaged for about a (00:39:16) year before we kind of ever met in (00:39:18) person. And then we finally met up for (00:39:23) uh a drink in New York. I almost uh left (00:39:26) cuz she was about 45 minutes late. um (00:39:30) which which I I now know is a is a a (00:39:32) thing. So I I expect that. Um (00:39:35) >> but I I thankfully I stayed and she sat (00:39:38) down and we we had a great conversation (00:39:40) and (00:39:42) um went back to her place after to to (00:39:45) have another drink. And and as we walked (00:39:47) in, her mom was there watching Law and (00:39:49) Order. So I met her mother on the first (00:39:50) night that we met, which is perfect. It (00:39:53) wasn't until about a year after that (00:39:56) after talking, you know, back and forth (00:39:57) that I I was like, we need to really (00:39:59) give this a proper proper go. Let's (00:40:03) when you're back in LA next, let's go on (00:40:04) a date. And that night when I saw her (00:40:07) walk in, uh she was wearing blue jeans, (00:40:10) a white top, and like a black leather (00:40:12) jacket. And I just was like, I'm going (00:40:15) to marry this woman. And I knew it right (00:40:17) away. I told her that I loved her after (00:40:20) the second or third date. (00:40:23) And I called my mom the next day and (00:40:25) said, "I'm going to marry this woman. (00:40:27) I'd love for you to meet her soon." It (00:40:29) was literally 2 and a half months after (00:40:30) that that we were engaged and 3 months (00:40:32) after that or four months after that (00:40:33) that we were married. (00:40:35) >> Yeah. (00:40:35) >> 7 years later. It's crazy. (00:40:37) >> That's awesome. I love that. Yeah. I (00:40:39) love that. It is is when in that sense (00:40:41) when you know you know there's I'm (00:40:43) thinking about it as you're explaining (00:40:44) it like you've you know as I was saying (00:40:47) people are obsessed about your guys' (00:40:49) relationship you know analyzing it (00:40:51) constantly how have you protected that (00:40:53) even when you're going through things (00:40:55) like in the niku like (00:40:56) >> you know everyone's excited for you guys (00:40:58) to have kids there's you know you're in (00:41:00) the public eye both of you massive (00:41:01) superstars and how have you protected (00:41:03) that relationship through all of that (00:41:05) >> for some people on paper maybe at first (00:41:07) it it wasn't like the right fit. I maybe (00:41:10) it's fact that we do have an age (00:41:12) difference. We're from different parts (00:41:13) of the world. Um all those things are (00:41:15) exactly why it's right and why it works (00:41:17) and is so beautiful. There's so much (00:41:20) about the Indian culture which I've I've (00:41:23) gotten to know and and love family and (00:41:25) the importance of family and (00:41:28) big families being you know at the at (00:41:30) the center of that and and I really took (00:41:34) to all the the cultural differences and (00:41:37) loved um not just you know the family (00:41:40) aspect but the food and and friends and (00:41:42) just all of it. And so that was like (00:41:45) perfect. We checked that box and and (00:41:48) then like our our age difference was (00:41:51) something that I think really bonds us (00:41:53) and I've lived a lot of life and and you (00:41:55) know 33 years and so I think having (00:41:59) someone who who has real perspective and (00:42:00) and depth and and wanted to build a life (00:42:04) together was something that I was was (00:42:05) really drawn to. Um, and the way we (00:42:08) protect it, uh, I think is by finding (00:42:12) ways to to laugh through tough moments. (00:42:14) You know, not going to bed angry and (00:42:16) knowing that our ability to build life (00:42:19) together and to have our our privacy is (00:42:22) is on us. It's it's no one else's (00:42:24) responsibility. So, you know, we have to (00:42:27) we have to find those times to just be a (00:42:28) family, to just have the three of us be (00:42:30) together and have those quiet moments (00:42:32) and and really prioritize it cuz that (00:42:35) that is our only job (00:42:37) >> as parents is to to just create an (00:42:40) environment where she feels safe to to (00:42:42) grow and be herself and and it really (00:42:45) starts with with my wife and I building (00:42:47) that. And (00:42:49) um it's it's for no one else but us. (00:42:51) >> Yeah. Yeah, I was saying I love the way (00:42:53) you've celebrated (00:42:55) the culture together. I was saying that (00:42:56) the Dvali party at yours. (00:42:58) >> Yeah. (00:42:58) >> A few years back you were throwing this (00:43:00) incredible Dvali party. It's like the (00:43:02) best Dvali pies I've ever been to and it (00:43:03) would be like you I mean first of all (00:43:05) you look great in a ka too. So it's like (00:43:07) it helps but then like I remember Joe (00:43:09) being in a full Shirani too and like you (00:43:11) guys it felt like a wedding but you had (00:43:13) like the best Diwali food, best (00:43:15) decorations, the candle lights. I mean (00:43:17) it was spectacular. and to to celebrate (00:43:19) that with you and for you to invite (00:43:21) >> so many of your friends who may not be (00:43:23) aware of Dvali and the culture and the (00:43:25) way you both brought that in LA was was (00:43:28) so spectacular. Like I loved it. It was (00:43:30) one of my it was without a doubt one of (00:43:31) my favorite Dvali parties ever. So (00:43:33) >> we had the best time. It was it was a (00:43:35) >> an amazing thing to to bring the Daisy (00:43:38) culture into LA like that and to feel so (00:43:41) many of our friends who who hadn't (00:43:43) experienced it just having the time of (00:43:44) their life. You know, I think Indians (00:43:46) know how to do holidays way better than (00:43:48) than than we do here in the US. (00:43:51) >> Well, well, well, based on that, I don't (00:43:53) know if you know this, but Priyanka has (00:43:55) sent some uh answers to some questions. (00:43:57) >> Oh, really? (00:43:58) >> And we asked her, (00:43:59) >> okay, (00:43:59) >> beforehand. So, I'm going to ask you the (00:44:01) same questions. And and from what I (00:44:02) know, I was I was telling the team when (00:44:04) we were preparing for this, I was like, (00:44:05) you know, Nick's really good at details. (00:44:07) Like, I was like, I've seen Nick talk (00:44:09) about Brian. Like, he doesn't miss a (00:44:10) beat. And we share that. I'm like that (00:44:12) when me and my wife talk, I'm like, I (00:44:13) know all the details. (00:44:17) And so I was like on that (00:44:21) right (00:44:25) >> and Priyanka sent her answers. So that (00:44:26) they're all real answers. They've been (00:44:28) verified. So what was Priyanka's first (00:44:31) impression of Nick? (00:44:34) >> What would she say? (00:44:35) >> Handsome. No. Um, I think she probably (00:44:40) thought that I was um, (00:44:43) you know, sort of quiet as we discussed, (00:44:44) you know, reserved, um, choosing my (00:44:47) words carefully or whatever. I was (00:44:49) surprised at how candid she was and (00:44:52) funny. Uh, you know, she's she to me at (00:44:55) that point, I had seen her interviews (00:44:58) and things and she's she's quite regal, (00:44:59) right? she has this real like (00:45:01) >> presence about her and I and so I I I (00:45:04) don't know expected me but I was I think (00:45:07) um (00:45:09) she would say that I was like trying to (00:45:11) seem more adult or something cuz she she (00:45:15) talks about how she thought I was like (00:45:16) putting on a bit of an act like this is (00:45:17) just it's who I am. Sorry. (00:45:20) >> Is that so she says it shows how well (00:45:23) you know each other. She goes he was (00:45:24) acting older than he is. He took me to a (00:45:27) bougie bar with an average age of 65. (00:45:30) >> Yeah, that's true. (00:45:32) >> That's true. (00:45:33) >> That's true. 65. (00:45:34) >> I mean, around that. It's a great bar. (00:45:37) They've got nice little jazz quartet. (00:45:40) I thought it was good. (00:45:42) >> Okay. Uh, second question. Where was (00:45:44) your first kiss? (00:45:45) >> First kiss um was (00:45:48) on the balcony at her hotel (00:45:52) um (00:45:53) right here in Los Angeles. (00:45:55) >> Yeah. She was very specific. She said (00:45:56) the peninsula in LA date number two. (00:45:59) >> Yes. (00:45:59) >> So if anyone wants to uh go and visit (00:46:03) that site, you can be specific. (00:46:05) >> The site of the first kiss. (00:46:06) >> Yeah. Who said I love you first? (00:46:08) >> I did. Yeah. (00:46:09) >> Yeah. She said Nick 3 to 4 days in. (00:46:12) >> Yeah. (00:46:12) >> What was the moment you realized that (00:46:14) Nick was the one? (00:46:15) >> Oh, (00:46:17) maybe when (00:46:20) I went to India with her for the first (00:46:21) time. (00:46:22) >> She said when he asked me to marry him (00:46:23) and I said yes. Oh, well that's good (00:46:25) timing. (00:46:27) >> It's like Yeah, just just in time. (00:46:29) That's right. (00:46:29) >> Just in time. (00:46:30) >> What would Priyanka say Nick was the (00:46:32) most nervous about on your wedding day? (00:46:34) >> To be honest, I wasn't I wasn't that (00:46:37) nervous about (00:46:39) anything on the wedding day. It was just (00:46:42) it was hot. So, I was I was nervous I (00:46:44) was going to be sweating and that I (00:46:46) would look crazy. But uh no, I I think (00:46:48) when she when she walked out, she came (00:46:51) down the stairs (00:46:53) um I felt this overwhelming sense of (00:46:56) peace (00:46:57) >> like I was exactly where I was supposed (00:46:58) to be. (00:46:59) >> Yeah, she agrees. She says he was so (00:47:00) sure in control. I never saw him (00:47:02) nervous. So you you hit the sweats. (00:47:05) Well, that's it's impressive. That's I (00:47:07) know those Indian outfits get so hot. (00:47:10) >> Oh my. That is one thing they need to (00:47:12) figure out. (00:47:13) >> Every time I'm wearing a Kurto, I'm like (00:47:15) this is so hot. I don't answer. Anyone (00:47:17) does in India. Uh, what is Brianka's (00:47:19) favorite song of Nicks? (00:47:21) >> I (00:47:23) think um I believe (00:47:26) >> she says Close. (00:47:27) >> Close. Oh, that's right. I did know (00:47:28) that. (00:47:29) >> Close. She loves close. (00:47:32) >> Yeah. (00:47:32) >> So, that's the only wrong one so far. (00:47:34) That's This is really This is going (00:47:35) great. We've got a few more. What is (00:47:37) Priyanka's favorite dish Nick cooks for (00:47:39) her? (00:47:39) >> I can't really uh cook that well. I make (00:47:42) sandwiches sometimes. (00:47:44) >> She says tuna sandwich. Oh, (00:47:45) >> yeah. That's perfect. Yeah, (00:47:46) >> that's about all all I can do. (00:47:48) >> Yeah. Yeah, me too. I I can't cook to (00:47:49) save my life. So, uh, what is Nick's (00:47:51) most annoying habit? (00:47:54) >> Uh, I I cannot think of what she's going (00:47:58) to say for this. Overthinking. (00:48:03) Is that Is that a fair answer? (00:48:05) >> She goes, "When he's talking to me on (00:48:06) the phone and typing a text, lol." (00:48:09) >> She does hate that. She'll ask me, "Hey, (00:48:12) can you make sure to send this message (00:48:14) to it?" like, "Yeah, yeah." So, I'm (00:48:15) doing it in real time so I don't forget. (00:48:17) >> Yeah, totally. (00:48:17) >> She's like, "I'm on the phone with you." (00:48:18) I'm like, "But you just (00:48:19) >> You just told me." Yeah. I don't want to (00:48:20) forget. (00:48:21) >> To write it down. (00:48:22) >> I'm with you. I'm with you on that one (00:48:23) and I'm on your side. (00:48:24) >> He has a separate device. (00:48:25) >> Yeah. Absolutely. You're just being (00:48:26) productive. Efficient. Yeah. What does (00:48:29) Priyanka do that really annoys Nick? (00:48:31) >> She will answer the phone and then be (00:48:33) talking to someone else in the room for (00:48:35) like 30 seconds before she then My is (00:48:38) always just like just call me back if (00:48:40) you're in the middle of a conversation. (00:48:41) But it's like literally we'll be (00:48:44) talking. (00:48:44) >> Yeah. Yeah. (00:48:45) >> And as if I'm on the phone with She's (00:48:47) It's connected, but we're still talking. (00:48:48) Then she goes, "Hey, what's up?" I'm (00:48:50) like, (00:48:51) >> "Hi." (00:48:53) >> It's not like a real thing. Annoying (00:48:56) thing. It's just funny. (00:48:57) >> Yeah. She goes, "I interrupt him when (00:48:58) he's talking, but it's actually the (00:49:00) other way around. It's it's calling you (00:49:02) and then talking to someone else." I (00:49:03) love that. (00:49:04) >> What would Priyanka say is the thing (00:49:06) Nick does that makes her laugh every (00:49:08) time? (00:49:09) >> Not a good answer, but I don't know. (00:49:11) What is it (00:49:12) >> when he's being desy? It's an endearing (00:49:14) laugh. (00:49:15) >> That's That's nice. (00:49:17) >> And then final one. What is Nick way too (00:49:19) competitive about? (00:49:21) >> Most things, I would say. (00:49:23) >> She said everything. (00:49:24) >> Everything. (00:49:26) >> Well, that's pretty good. (00:49:27) >> You did good, Nick. I I mean, you did I (00:49:29) I literally think you got like two wrong (00:49:31) out of like 20 questions. That's pretty (00:49:33) impressive. So, you are competitive at (00:49:35) everything cuz (00:49:36) >> I am. (00:49:36) >> You did pretty good. I love that. Ben, (00:49:38) one thing that I think you know (00:49:40) genuinely and you know even from the way (00:49:42) you've talked today, (00:49:44) you're such a it feels like you're (00:49:46) trying to be such a present good (00:49:49) husband. I wanted to ask you what what (00:49:51) is a good husband? What makes a good (00:49:53) husband? What are you aspiring to be (00:49:55) when you're trying to be a good husband? (00:49:57) I think that being a good husband for me (00:49:59) means (00:50:00) being reliable, (00:50:02) um, trustworthy, (00:50:05) um, knowing that (00:50:09) our daughter (00:50:11) is watching and will one day (00:50:15) hopefully find somebody that makes her (00:50:18) incredibly happy. and the way in which I (00:50:21) treat her mother (00:50:23) is incredibly important to who she (00:50:26) becomes. Um, so it is my my (00:50:29) responsibility to do all I can to make (00:50:33) Priyanka happy, to feel safe, (00:50:37) and to make her laugh, to to know that (00:50:41) that life is a mixed bag of emotions and (00:50:45) experiences, and it can feel really uh (00:50:49) disorienting and overwhelming sometimes. (00:50:52) But it's a lot easier to traverse all (00:50:54) that (00:50:55) with a partner who you can rely on. (00:51:00) >> Well said. Really, really well said. (00:51:01) Where with your inner critic, where in (00:51:04) your married life have you had to give (00:51:07) yourself more grace? (00:51:08) >> I can be reactive. Um, it's part of (00:51:11) being a sibling. I feel, you know, we (00:51:14) all do that, right? We we and you kind (00:51:16) of do it when you're growing up cuz you (00:51:18) you're fighting for your place in the (00:51:20) dynamic of the family and you share that (00:51:22) space with these people as you know kids (00:51:25) and teens. You kind of have to fight for (00:51:27) yourself a little bit and defend and um (00:51:30) being defensive I feel like is an area (00:51:32) in my my life as a whole but also my (00:51:34) marriage that I I'm always trying to (00:51:35) improve on. (00:51:36) >> Um thinking that you know that a a (00:51:41) comment of any kind is somehow a (00:51:42) criticism of me. I'm like, I'm supposed (00:51:45) to just trust this person to to care for (00:51:48) me and and yet I'm being defensive about (00:51:51) a thing that's so insignificant. And (00:51:53) >> what am I trying to protect is the thing (00:51:55) I always think about. Like, and it's (00:51:58) this guy, this other version of me that (00:52:01) I I somehow believe is like perfect. (00:52:05) >> I'm like, how stupid can I be? That's (00:52:08) not only impossible, it's just dumb. (00:52:10) like you just and I I've seen that the (00:52:14) times in my relationship with my wife (00:52:17) where I'm quicker to, (00:52:21) you know, a hug as opposed to something (00:52:23) defensive or trying to defend (00:52:26) myself. It's like just better. (00:52:28) >> Mhm. (00:52:29) >> Life is better, (00:52:30) >> aren't we all? We could all relate to (00:52:32) that. (00:52:33) >> Yeah. always trying to protect my ego, (00:52:35) protect my, you know, sense of self when (00:52:38) when in reality it's, yeah, it's this (00:52:41) trying to protect this perfect version (00:52:42) of me that definitely doesn't exist. And (00:52:45) yeah, you just Yeah, it's it's crazy (00:52:47) what you what you could risk losing by (00:52:50) trying to protect something that (00:52:51) >> Yeah. (00:52:52) >> that isn't isn't isn't even real, you (00:52:55) know? (00:52:55) >> So true. (00:52:56) >> Yeah. I want to pick out another lyric (00:52:58) that I loved. You write in your song (00:52:59) Princesses. (00:53:01) I use my imagination for a living. I (00:53:04) tell stories and build worlds. But I (00:53:06) never wanted one more than this one with (00:53:08) my little girl. I'm fascinated by your (00:53:10) questions. I'm terrified to let you (00:53:12) down. There's no one and nowhere that (00:53:14) I'd rather be than with you here right (00:53:16) now. And even when you started this (00:53:18) interview, you talked about how your (00:53:20) sense of self has changed so much since (00:53:23) being a father. (00:53:24) >> Yeah. (00:53:25) What has been the thing that surprised (00:53:27) you most about yourself since having (00:53:30) your daughter? (00:53:31) >> If I'm being totally honest, which I (00:53:33) want to be, um, (00:53:37) things surprised me most (00:53:39) is how easy it was to (00:53:43) play make believe and be silly and do a (00:53:46) kid voice. Like I I was never one of (00:53:49) those people that did the kind of voice (00:53:51) and all of a sudden I'm just doing it. I (00:53:54) always was embarrassed to to be silly. (00:53:58) Um, (00:54:00) and I I'm not with her. And I I love the (00:54:04) world that she builds with her mind. And (00:54:06) getting to spend time with her there is (00:54:09) is really incredible. (00:54:11) >> And I think it's made me a a better (00:54:14) friend and and husband and and better (00:54:18) creator, you know, as as I approach my (00:54:22) songwriting now. and and (00:54:24) you know, the work I do as an actor, I (00:54:27) feel like I'm way more prepared (00:54:30) uh for that because I I've gotten to (00:54:33) spend time in her world and and it's (00:54:36) this magical place where like anything's (00:54:38) possible, you know, and and it's such a (00:54:40) wonderful wonderful thing. (00:54:43) >> What was your what was both of your (00:54:44) reasons for wanting to keep her out of (00:54:46) the spotlight and keep her personal life (00:54:49) pretty private? (00:54:50) >> It should be her choice. (00:54:53) Um, (00:54:54) I'm grateful that my parents supported (00:54:56) our dream and that they they never, you (00:55:01) know, looked back or questioned it. They (00:55:02) they they ran with us, which was (00:55:05) wonderful. And we all knew this is what (00:55:07) we wanted to do. Um, she has not (00:55:10) expressed that yet. uh if she if she (00:55:13) does, we'll support her, you know, and (00:55:15) and and (00:55:17) give her all the context that that we (00:55:19) have from the the 20 plus years that we (00:55:21) both been doing what we've been doing. (00:55:23) That might be helpful, but it should be (00:55:25) her choice. And you know, the world is (00:55:27) is crazy, too. It's a weird (00:55:30) >> weird world. Um, and (00:55:33) so I I think it's it's better for her to (00:55:36) take her time and and you know, have (00:55:39) have the privacy that that she needs to (00:55:42) become who she wants to become. (00:55:43) >> It's a tough decision when she's like (00:55:44) trying to run onto the stage, right? (00:55:46) She's like, I want it like you know, but (00:55:48) no, it makes so much sense and it's such (00:55:50) a feel like parents over the last few (00:55:52) years have had to add that to all the (00:55:53) list of things that parents have to (00:55:55) worry about, (00:55:56) >> right? If you think about it, it's like (00:55:57) our parents never really had to think (00:55:59) about that. And then probably parents in (00:56:02) the last 10 to 15 years have had to (00:56:04) really maybe even 10 to 15 years ago you (00:56:06) didn't think about it you just did it (00:56:08) and then in the last 5 years 10 years (00:56:09) people are being so much more specific. (00:56:11) What we were talking earlier about as we (00:56:13) get older we almost get more scared and (00:56:14) you were talking about your younger self (00:56:16) being so fearless. What are the fears (00:56:18) that came up after having a daughter and (00:56:21) what were the fears that went away after (00:56:24) becoming a dad? (00:56:25) I have not uh been formally diagnosed (00:56:29) with anxiety. Um I mentioned I I speak (00:56:32) to a therapist. uh she's she's wonderful (00:56:35) and and has given me a lot of tools that (00:56:38) are are helpful when I feel uh kind of (00:56:42) overwhelmed or or anxious and naturally (00:56:45) during the time that we discussed where (00:56:47) our daughter was in the NICU um was a (00:56:51) stressful and overwhelming time and I (00:56:54) think having that as the sort of (00:56:57) foundation (00:56:58) for her entry into the world um made me (00:57:03) anxious. about everything. Um, not just (00:57:07) parenting and all that, but but life in (00:57:09) general. And so, I've had a few moments (00:57:12) where I' i've had flare-ups, I guess, (00:57:14) where I I was uh stressed to a degree (00:57:18) that didn't feel comfortable. And I (00:57:21) think a lot of parents can probably (00:57:22) relate to that. You know, it's a (00:57:26) you you're basically when you leave the (00:57:29) hospital, (00:57:31) they ask you, "Are you ready to take (00:57:34) your daughter home?" It's like, "Well, (00:57:37) of yeah, of course I I I you know, (00:57:40) >> but um it's a crazy question to be (00:57:43) asked. You're like, I get Yeah, I am. (00:57:46) >> I'm ready to take my daughter home." And (00:57:49) that like meant more than just that (00:57:51) moment. It was like her whole life (00:57:53) suddenly I'm like I'm I'm I'm (00:57:56) responsible for you know this person. (00:57:59) So (00:58:00) yeah that's the ne the positive that (00:58:03) I've taken is as I mentioned that the (00:58:06) ability to to just be silly and carefree (00:58:08) and (00:58:08) >> and see the world the way she does and (00:58:10) and all these experiences are so amazing (00:58:13) again things that can seem mundane (00:58:16) um as you get older and you just kind of (00:58:19) you know glass is clear. or why is glass (00:58:22) clear was one of the questions he asked (00:58:24) me. And it's like it's a fascinating (00:58:25) question. Why? How? Find myself on (00:58:28) Google like researching all this stuff (00:58:30) that I just sort of accepted. And now (00:58:33) this person, this little four-year-old (00:58:35) person's like, why? And you get to ask (00:58:39) the questions yourself. And and why are (00:58:42) people mean? It's like it's a great (00:58:44) question. Probably cuz they're hurting. (00:58:45) And (00:58:46) >> it was it's just everything uh gets sort (00:58:51) of go it goes through this new filter (00:58:54) >> that is uh (00:58:56) really exciting. It's amazing how both (00:58:58) the things you said are literally (00:59:00) counter opposites in that one part of (00:59:02) you of course has anxiety and care and (00:59:05) fear for this you know child that you (00:59:07) love and has gone through this you know (00:59:10) very difficult beginning to her life but (00:59:12) has blossomed and you know grown so (00:59:13) beautifully and then at the other end (00:59:15) it's like oh but I'm also more carefree (00:59:16) and like now I get to explore and now I (00:59:18) get to be curious and I and it's so (00:59:20) fascinating how like life does that to (00:59:22) you like I'm just sitting here literally (00:59:24) reflecting on and listening to you going (00:59:26) how strange strange like the same thing (00:59:28) that naturally you have a sense of fear (00:59:30) and anxiety around is the same thing (00:59:31) that's teaching you to be carefree and (00:59:34) be and it's like how do how does how (00:59:35) does a human even you know make sense of (00:59:38) that like how do you make sense of that (00:59:39) in the human experience it's uh with (00:59:42) your anxiety is that been something that (00:59:44) you've because that feels like more new (00:59:46) despite you having you know such a life (00:59:49) in the public eye we talked about all (00:59:50) the events building up to even this (00:59:53) point but I think yeah having a kid and (00:59:55) getting older feels like there's an (00:59:57) anxiety that parents get around that (00:59:59) that's, you know, incomparable to (01:00:01) anything they've experienced before. (01:00:02) What What's really helped you? What's (01:00:04) worked for you as a way to say this (01:00:06) really helps me when I'm experiencing (01:00:08) those moments or phases? (01:00:10) >> I think moving my body in some way (01:00:13) always helps. Getting physical, uh (01:00:15) whether that's working out or or taking (01:00:17) a long walk, playing golf. I really (01:00:20) enjoy playing golf. But when I was in (01:00:22) New York this last year doing this (01:00:24) Broadway show, um I had about a 45minute (01:00:28) walk from our apartment to the the (01:00:29) theater each day and it was so important (01:00:34) to my routine. Um the show itself is (01:00:37) incredibly intense and you know the (01:00:40) subject material is just like heavy. So (01:00:42) I needed a way to process some of those (01:00:45) those feelings each each day. Then on (01:00:47) top of that it's just it's a a lot of (01:00:49) work. eight shows a week, six days a (01:00:51) week. And so, you know, it was it was a (01:00:54) lot. And so those walks were important. (01:00:57) >> Um, and then I, you know, speaking to my (01:01:00) my therapist, it's not even like there's (01:01:03) practices per se, but there's just, I (01:01:06) think, (01:01:08) real health in a routine and and just (01:01:11) talking. I used to judge myself and kind (01:01:16) of during that process like talking with (01:01:20) therapists and like am I being as (01:01:22) truthful as I need to be to get the (01:01:24) results I'm hoping to get? And (01:01:27) >> I don't think that I always was uh as (01:01:29) transparent as as I probably needed to (01:01:31) be. um with this person that I speak to. (01:01:36) Um it's great because I I do feel that (01:01:38) that freedom, that safety to to speak (01:01:40) and and like there's there's real (01:01:43) balance and for for all the the men out (01:01:46) there, it's important. There is a stigma (01:01:49) still for a lot of people and there (01:01:50) shouldn't be. Um (01:01:53) and you're going to see like incredible (01:01:56) results in your life if you if you do (01:01:58) it. (01:01:59) >> Yeah, absolutely. And and it takes a (01:02:01) second to get honest with someone. I (01:02:02) mean, it's it's not, (01:02:04) you know, it's it's hard to even sit (01:02:06) with someone who who's a stranger and (01:02:08) doesn't know anything about your life (01:02:09) and really be honest, especially someone (01:02:10) like yourself who has a such a public (01:02:12) life and you can garner so much. I mean, (01:02:14) I was I was thinking about like I saw (01:02:17) your response to everyone wondering what (01:02:19) was happening at the Golden Globes and (01:02:20) you responded saying it hit you like a (01:02:22) gut punch and I was like, (01:02:24) >> what was that for you? What was (01:02:25) happening at the Golden Globes that you (01:02:26) were going through? (01:02:28) >> Yeah. So I I this is like the second (01:02:30) time I'm mentioning this on on this (01:02:32) conversation, but heat like really gets (01:02:35) me. Um and because I have a you know a (01:02:39) sort of physical aspect of that as well (01:02:41) with my my type 1 diabetes, it can just (01:02:44) have an effect, right? So (01:02:46) >> I was uh I was just really hot on the (01:02:48) carpet and then I started stressing that (01:02:51) I looked like I was sweating. My hands (01:02:53) were getting clammy and holding like (01:02:56) everything kind of hit me at once. Uh (01:02:57) then my sugar started to feel or my (01:02:59) glucose started to feel a little uh low (01:03:01) and and so I just took a step, went (01:03:03) outside, got some fresh air and and (01:03:05) >> you know, it's funny like we're we're (01:03:08) all the same, right? Like we get (01:03:09) overwhelmed, we get hot. It's like (01:03:12) >> it's a lot happening. Um and so I just (01:03:14) was like, you know what, there's no harm (01:03:16) in just taking a beat for myself. That's (01:03:18) that's what I did. (01:03:19) >> Had a sip of water and was back in (01:03:21) action. (01:03:21) >> I'm glad you gave everyone else (01:03:22) permission to do the same. (01:03:24) >> Yeah. Everyone, if you need second, take (01:03:26) a second. I I'm so far away from this (01:03:28) world obviously I didn't grow up in this (01:03:30) world and then when you you know get (01:03:32) onto a red carpet and you just realize (01:03:33) especially for someone like yourself (01:03:34) Priyanka etc of just like the amount of (01:03:36) people shouting your name the amount of (01:03:38) stops that you have to do how quickly (01:03:39) everything moves like (01:03:41) >> you know TV interview video interview (01:03:43) this that it's it's so chaotic those red (01:03:46) carpets especially at those big events (01:03:48) that I think there's it's it's hard to (01:03:50) understand why it would feel stressful (01:03:52) cuz it almost looks really glamorous in (01:03:54) the pictures and (01:03:55) >> and to some degree It is, but but it (01:03:58) isn't as well. Like it, you know, (01:03:59) >> it can be a lot. (01:04:00) >> I think more often than not, people feel (01:04:01) quite anxious on red carpets. From what (01:04:03) I've heard, at least from talking to (01:04:04) people. (01:04:04) >> Yeah. (01:04:05) >> Yeah. (01:04:06) >> Um especially when it's like 95°. I (01:04:08) think it was a cold week in LA and they (01:04:10) had it tinted thinking it was going to (01:04:11) be (01:04:12) >> cold and it ended up being a really hot (01:04:14) day. So, it was just kind of cooking (01:04:16) >> and it it was, you know, the only (01:04:18) positive from that was that it was a (01:04:20) really good conversation starter inside. (01:04:21) >> Yeah. Yeah. (01:04:22) >> You immediately could be like, "How hot (01:04:24) was the carpet?" Huh? That just sort of (01:04:26) broke the ice. (01:04:27) >> That's so good. Yeah. Yeah, that (01:04:30) definitely does help. Yeah, that or if (01:04:31) it's raining in LA becomes a great (01:04:33) couple. Very rare to happen, too. (01:04:35) >> Nick, it's been uh it's been amazing (01:04:37) talking to you and I really appreciate (01:04:38) how honest you've been, how, (01:04:40) >> you know, thoughtful you've been. Just I (01:04:42) felt like I've laughed with you. You (01:04:44) know, you've you've brought us all to (01:04:46) really emotional moments of just like (01:04:47) sitting with you through the journey (01:04:48) you've been on. And I feel like as a man (01:04:51) listening to someone who is speaking so (01:04:54) openly about therapy, about selfwork, (01:04:56) about being a loving father, husband, I (01:04:58) think you're just setting a wonderful (01:05:00) example and and also a human example. I (01:05:02) think one that is real and, you know, (01:05:05) isn't perfect and isn't coming across as (01:05:08) this is how to do it, but it's like this (01:05:09) is the reality of everything I'm trying (01:05:11) to juggle. Yeah. And and I think as (01:05:13) someone who I I hope I get to be a dad (01:05:14) one day, it's like it's nice to see the, (01:05:17) you know, the thoughts that will (01:05:18) probably go through my head too and and (01:05:20) the realities of what it feels like when (01:05:22) you're finally holding this human that (01:05:24) you love so deeply and get to experience (01:05:26) the carefree, curious, but also the (01:05:29) stress and the anxiety that comes with (01:05:30) it. So, thank you for giving us all the (01:05:32) layers, (01:05:33) >> of course. Thank you for (01:05:34) >> asking such thoughtful questions. And (01:05:37) you'll be an amazing father someday. So, (01:05:39) I I I hope that for you. And um you (01:05:43) know, I I certainly um I'll be the first (01:05:47) to admit I don't know what the hell I'm (01:05:49) doing. Um I'm just trying to do my best, (01:05:52) I guess. And you know, my my (01:05:55) dad set a pretty incredible example and (01:05:59) all the (01:06:01) sort of you know, memories there um are (01:06:04) things I'm trying to take into and apply (01:06:06) into my my life now. So, thanks for the (01:06:08) conversation. This was great. (01:06:09) >> I love it. Thank you so much. We created (01:06:11) a special ending for you. Seeing as your (01:06:15) new single is called Gut Punch. (01:06:17) >> Mhm. (01:06:17) >> We're going to play a game called Gut (01:06:19) Reaction. (01:06:20) >> Okay. (01:06:20) >> So, you have to finish the sentence with (01:06:22) the first word or phrase that pops into (01:06:24) your head. (01:06:24) >> Perfect. (01:06:25) >> What is the best advice you've ever (01:06:27) received? (01:06:28) >> Live like you're at the bottom, even if (01:06:29) you're at the top. (01:06:30) >> That is a great answer. We've never had (01:06:32) that before. I love that. All right. (01:06:34) Second question. What is the worst (01:06:36) advice you've ever heard or received? (01:06:38) >> Take this tequila shot. (01:06:42) >> Yeah, (01:06:43) >> it's a good answer. (01:06:44) >> It's never never a good idea. (01:06:46) >> You're good at gut gut reaction. So, (01:06:48) this is good. The brother I call when I (01:06:51) need to be brutally honest is (01:06:55) >> Joe, but all all three of my brothers, (01:06:57) but you know. Yeah, Joe. (01:07:00) >> Yeah. My guilty pleasure artist or song (01:07:03) is. (01:07:04) >> This is not a one word answer. I'm (01:07:05) sorry, but I don't believe in guilty (01:07:06) pleasures. I think you should be able to (01:07:08) love whatever you love. There's good in (01:07:10) everything. I feel the same way about (01:07:12) TV, (01:07:13) >> but there are shows that are just trash, (01:07:15) which I love. (01:07:17) >> So, what is the artist or song that (01:07:20) isn't a guilty pleasure, but you're (01:07:21) allowed to love? (01:07:22) >> Nickelback. (01:07:24) It's great. I love the songs. They're (01:07:26) fantastic. (01:07:27) >> I love it. Uh, the thing I hate (01:07:29) admitting Priyanka is always right about (01:07:31) is (01:07:32) >> people. (01:07:33) >> Ah, wow. (01:07:34) >> Yeah, she's always right about people. (01:07:36) Before I can see it, I'm like, (01:07:38) >> damn, she's right again. (01:07:40) >> Wow, that's that's a good skill to have. (01:07:42) >> Not always negative either. It's not (01:07:43) like she's skeptical of people, but she (01:07:45) has she's really perceptive and and (01:07:47) >> listens. So, you know, it's Yeah, Pet. (01:07:50) >> I love that. All right, fifth and final (01:07:52) question. We ask this to every guest (01:07:53) who's ever been on the show. If you (01:07:55) could create one law that everyone in (01:07:57) the world had to follow, what would it (01:07:59) be? (01:07:59) >> I think teachers should get paid more. (01:08:03) >> So, yeah, let's make that a law kind of. (01:08:06) >> Yeah. Yeah. (01:08:06) >> But (01:08:07) >> we'll probably add the NICU nurses to (01:08:08) that as well. Exactly. They're amazing (01:08:11) people who are working super hard every (01:08:13) day make making the country actually (01:08:15) function. So, (01:08:17) >> so true. (01:08:17) >> Yeah. (01:08:18) >> Nick Jonas, so excited for Sunday best (01:08:20) and for everyone to listen to it. Thank (01:08:22) you for uh being such a joy to spend (01:08:24) time with. I'm so grateful that we got (01:08:26) to do this and I hope we get to do it (01:08:27) again. We got to get you and Priyanka (01:08:28) back together at some point. That's (01:08:30) that's my big goal. (01:08:31) >> I would love that. (01:08:32) >> Yeah, that would be a lot of fun. Thank (01:08:33) you, man. Thank you so much. If you love (01:08:35) this episode, you'll really enjoy my (01:08:38) episode with Selena Gomez on befriending (01:08:41) your inner critic and how to speak to (01:08:43) yourself with more compassion. (01:08:46) >> My fears are only going to continue to (01:08:49) show me what I'm capable of. The more (01:08:51) that I face my fears, the more that I (01:08:54) feel I'm gaining strength. I'm gaining (01:08:56) wisdom.